Apr 22
As i think table manner is very important.. i wouldn’t want to see my kid running around when we are having dinner in the restaurant… or while attending any of my friend’s wedding dinner… and obviously i wouldn’t want to see my kid to scream or throw their food or even the utensils around… I know a lot of patience needed here… but at the same time i need some guidelines on how to train my little Daphne and E Zen on this too…
Below is an article i read from BabyCenter which i think is quite good.. hehe
What should I do when my toddler misbehaves at the table?
You have a couple of choices. Some parents find it’s best to ignore the misbehavior — the spitting, the screaming, the mess-making. When this tactic works, it’s because the child stops doing whatever gets no response. Other parents find that it’s better to find ways to discourage their child’s problematic behavior. One mom discovered that if she wiped her toddler’s face every time he spit out his food, he’d stop spitting. Other times just a reminder, like placing the spoon in your toddler’s hand when he grabs a fistful of food, is all that’s needed. And some parents simply remove their toddlers from the table when they do things that are unacceptable, explaining that their behavior is not good manners.
If you make it enjoyable for your toddler to share meals with you — by talking with him and being upbeat — then he’s more likely to want to stay and share the good vibes. Next time (or eventually, in any case), he won’t do things that get him banished.Can I really expect my toddler to learn good table manners?
It may seem like a long shot, as you watch him purposely drop his spoon on the floor and gleefully fingerpaint with his mashed potatoes. But with a big serving of patience, you can start instilling the idea that there are acceptable and unacceptable ways to act at the table. Manners are built over time, and you can start teaching your child some concepts just as soon as he can sit in a highchair.What can I teach him?
Of course, you won’t be showing your toddler which fork to use for dessert, or how to gracefully dip his soup spoon. But you can teach him that mealtime is a pleasant experience for the family. You can help him wash his hands before coming to the table, and you can start teaching him not to bang or throw utensils, not to throw food or grab it from other people’s plates, and not to spit, scream, or run around the table while others are eating. And just as soon as your child can talk, he can learn to say "please" and "thank you."What’s the best way to tackle these lessons?
Your toddler wants to please you, and he wants to be like you, so the best way is to show him how it’s done. Talk pleasantly at the table — no lectures, arguments, or raised voices. Say "please" and "thank you" when you ask for something to be passed. And don’t read the paper, watch television, talk on the phone, or jump up to tend to other things.
Consistency will help make good manners a habit for your child in the coming years, so when you introduce a behavior, set expectations and use gentle reminders to reinforce them. Once your child learns to say "please," prompt him to say it before you give him that second helping, for example.
Give your child strokes for behaving well at the table — when he sits quietly, uses his spoon, and says "thank you." Don’t overdo the praise, though, because you don’t want him to think that he’s the center of attention whenever you sit down to share a meal.What are some good rules at this point?
Different families are comfortable with different rules, so you get to decide. One family might be fine with everyone coming to dinner in their bathing suits or jammies, for example, while another may require that everyone get dressed for dinner. Your family might enforce the "no elbows on the table" rule, while another has no such rule.
So you’ll want to make sure that your child learns to be polite, but there’s some leeway on what that means. As he grows, teach him the basics (to say "please" and "thank you," to chew with his mouth closed, to be pleasant) and even some nitty gritty (like how to handle his napkin), but don’t get too hung up on formalities. Good manners are really about being considerate of others. If your child keeps that in mind, he’ll do fine.
There are a couple of rules you might not want to enforce at mealtimes, though. One is the old "clean your plate" rule. You want your child to learn to stop eating when his body says it’s full, not when everything in front of him is gone. So offer small portions, refilling as necessary, and respect his decision to stop eating.
At this age, you might also forgo the rule about sitting at the table until everybody is finished eating. It’s your toddler’s nature to be active, and it’s likely he just can’t sit still that long. A better idea might be to let him leave the table whenever he’s finished and play quietly nearby. You might want to say that once he leaves he can’t come back for more food, though, so he won’t get into the habit of coming and going throughout the meal. (As soon as he’s old enough to handle sentences, you can teach him to say "May I please be excused?" when he’s finished, but that’s down the road a bit.)How can I get my toddler to behave in restaurants?
At this age, it’s a matter of preparation and chance. For one thing, you can’t expect a toddler to sit still for a long meal, so choose a restaurant that’s not too crowded or too leisurely about serving. You may even want to call in your order ahead of time.
Make sure your child is well rested when you arrive, and that he’s hungry (but not to the point of meltdown!). And even though it’s generally considered bad manners to bring toys to the table, something to engage your child’s interest at this age is completely acceptable. Just make sure it’s something quiet.
If your toddler’s been learning table manners at home, you can hope that he’ll remember not to bang his utensils, yell, spit, or throw food. If he does misbehave in a way that disturbs other diners, though, pick him up and leave, without fanfare. Don’t reprimand your toddler in public, but do tell him when you leave that his manners are not acceptable. Then try not to let your disappointment at a ruined dinner override your understanding of his developmental stage.
So have any idea on how to train your toddler d? So i guess now i have to select some toys… so that i can bring it along with me when we go out for food… (I will try not to give them any until there’s no choice)
Daphne on Table Manner
Oh ya.. come to think of it.. i still remember last time… around few months back… we used to let Daphne play with toys while she having her lunch or even dinner… this is to distract her while we feeding her… cause without doing that she always can’t finish her food… but after i read some article on how to feed your toddler last time… i stop giving her spoon, plate, fork or even toys to play around… ya i stopped giving her those thing and explain to her that.. those things are not to play.. and we can’t play while having our food… seems like she understand what i say… although she will still try to request for this by pointing them while i feeding her… but i will tell her can’t… and explain to her why… for example… she pointing at the display fruits… of course is fake fruit –_-“ then i will tell her.. that’s for display (at that point… the words “for nice” came out from my mind… but i didn’t say it of course… Jen, and Jason will understand.. what’s for nice.. hahaha) only.. not to eat… then she will stop pointing it…
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